(Previous:) I use Wikipedia so much and there are other places this should-mention could get put but I’ll try to jot about it now, that the “Show” has been nonstop invisibly-torturing me for 25 years and in 1995 I’d gotten a room in a welfare hotel and started buying loose encyclopedia volumes for a quarter from a thrift shop (St. Vincent de Paul,) and then I combined the articles on some historical figure or another from the different encyclopedias so that I’d wind up with slightly different facts and illustrations, a better-rounded idea of the different subjects and I had a whole file cabinet from the five and a half years of just being stuck staying in the welfare hotel alone like that and it seems pretty obvious to me that while supervising the torture over me the system had taken that idea and put it to use for themselves. Maybe I should move that photo of the big combined-building (from 4th and L) up to here since there’s a little similarity that similarly the system had amused itself during the boring supervision over my tiny business of being in these shelters, the one that was in the lot in front of the big building, by thinking up this weird-seeming ritual:
(from April and then May and now still trying to describe how it worked:)
I’ve been trying to get that RITUAL-patterns message-set through and think it will go when/if I get to a regular library-use time so I haven’t tried to retype it and it just preys on my mind that it’s undone yet. Now it’s me that’s trapped in a pattern I can’t get out of, the one of 2005-15 where I’m obsessed with looking up just a little more library-type material (research and work are words the invisible-torture keeps me afraid of using,) and all my days are taken into that with this torture like riding my head as usual, everything the same “Armageddon Program” patterns and unprovable and worsening, etc. And I see that there’s only a huge-huge trap-trick ahead of me and don’t have anyone to ventilate about it to, to do with the international or global “narcotic” trafficking, the “French Connection,” aspect of all this, the whole planeticide. I have to (“try to,” mimicking my teeny self,) print out a copy of that permission form below here, (the one to Workman Pubs.) for an image of what it’s like with “this thing on my head.” The building photo (the ritual behind it) is an example of what the system does outside while sitting on me.
7/15/18, I finally got a chance to look up the cellphone-Messages I’d sent trying to quick-describe this little business and they’ve expired and are gone so I’ll have to sit and gather my recollections in order to try to explain why this big picture is here, the different parts.
Hardly any of those big buildings had been there in 2001. In the parking lot in from of that big building, in that little triangular area, there’d been 8 trailers used for a women’s shelter and there was always talk about getting affordable housing built for everyone. Then the system built 3 brick attached houses, looked like 3 families could live in them and I couldn’t figure why that little for such a good-seeming location, only 3 units. I hadn’t been in the area in years so I thought to check see what it looked like now with all the nearby construction and it was that main big building and it’s really several different apartment or condominiums side by side on the street to enter into. I realized that the small-seeming construction work was a ritual for making this “sandwich-style” architecture, and that’s what the torture did with its time while monitoring and sabotaging my life, that they always do things while supervising this “Armageddon Show.” There’s a whole aspect that there was also then a guard-shack there that’d seemed pretty active in letting people into the back of the 3 new houses, so I figure that the system was somehow just digging and designing-up some whole big new underworld-area that was connected to the new supermarket a block in the other direction that was connected to “traditional” underground-areas further on its other side, etc. It’s really pretty sad, that the new architecture reminds me of egg cartons, just stacked up places for people to wait till it’s there turn is always the feeling. That’s alot like the “Mani,” the Manichaean belief-set maybe. The Jomon would have trained the earlier-Ainu that I think Mani and the Babar-types had come from to also believe they were LIMITLESSLY brilliant and better off to just stay high and stay underground and not worry about what the boring drudge-morons thought. And with Mani there’s the big “light” and “dark” dichotomy very clearly, the thinking that one side was good and the other kind evil. He was Persian and so was the cat Dylan was holding on the album cover.